Asking good questions

Have you ever been in one of those conversations?

You know the sort.. whether you are in a tense and difficult conversation, conducting an interview, sitting next to someone at a wedding or meeting someone for a meal, it’s one of those conversations where it’s like wading through treacle to get the conversation going beyond the yes and no answers.

Time seems to drag and you feel like checking your watch, but know it will look impatient and rude.

There are several things reasons why this conversation could have dried up, and several things you can do to try and remedy the situation.

One powerful technique for opening up conversations, encouraging conversation and helping people express themselves better is using open questions.

There are two main types of questions, closed questions and open questions.

Closed questions can be usually be answered by a simple “yes” or “no” (eg: is there any way I can help, do you like your food, is there anything else we need to discuss, do you think this job is for you). These can be really important in beginning and finishing a conversation and can be helpful in confirming details or information.

Open Questions tend to give us more information about the other person and encourage them to speak, share their feelings or thoughts and help bring resolution to conflict more easily. (eg: tell me what you enjoy about your job, what do you think is the best way forwards for us, what is on your mind at the moment, where can you see opportunities and obstacles in the path ahead).

So where are you going to use open questions to bring more out of a conversation?

What situations can you identify from this last week where you could have used open questions rather than closed ones?

If you would like to find out more about good listening, coaching, conflict resolution or team training, please email vicki@multiplycoaching.com